Endless campaigning, vicious online arguments, a ruthless political dynasty — we’re not talking about the NYC Democratic mayoral primary; we’re talking about the annual Sanrio character ranking. Well, maybe we’re talking about both. Even though one features a cast of cute animals and the other a group of ambitious would-be leaders, your social-media feed is probably full of people telling you whom to vote for, whom to rank, and who, by no means, should be on the ballot. Despite their differences in species, dimensions, and cuteness, there are similarities between both slates. We tried to match both sets of hopefuls with their animal or mayoral counterpart below as polls close for both elections this week (June 29 for Sanrio and today, June 24, for the mayoral — though it may be at least a week until we know the results for sure). Just doing our part for democracy.
Michael Blake = Hello Kitty
Former vice-chair of the DNC and former New York State representative Blake has been in politics for a long time despite his relatively young age. A key figure in both of Barack Obama’s presidential campaigns, Blake is giving “canonical Democrat.” Hello Kitty is the face of Sanrio but hasn’t won since 2020, which is kind of embarrassing considering she was the winner for a decade straight in the early aughts.
Andrew Cuomo = Cinnamoroll
The former governor of New York and nepo baby is hoping to win the mayoral primary on name recognition alone. As with Cuomo, the internet is rallying to take Cinnamoroll down: He’s won the past five years in a row and the subject of a Sanrio favoritism controversy after the company scheduled meet and greets with the fluffy puppy during primaries.
Adrienne Adams = Bad Badtz-Maru
Adams — the “good” Adams — is a practical Democrat with years of experience and a good head on her shoulders. She’s a competent choice but has struggled to stand out in a crowded field to those who weren’t already familiar with her. As with Badtz-Maru, the people who know him love him, but he just can’t get over the “bad” in his name.
Whitney Tilson = Petapetaminilian
Tilson is a former hedge-fund manager, prominent Democratic donor, and one of the founders of Teach for America. Petapetaminilian are a weird little alien crew that wants to invade earth and collect stickers, which is basically what a hedge-fund manager does.
Paperboy Prince = Hangyodon
Evergreen joke candidate. And Hangyodon brings jokes.
Jessica Ramos = Kuromi
Ramos is a usually progressive politican who surprised her constituents and supporters by endorsing Cuomo to stop the rise of Democratic Socialist candidate Zohran Mamdani. Kuromi, while super cute, is mischievous and unpredictable — kind of like Ramos’s endorsement.
Scott Stringer = Chococat
Here’s a middle-ground option projecting skill, intelligence, seriousness, and little to rock the boat. Chococat was beloved in the ’90s but has never dominated the rankings. Though as a solid (and safe) choice, neither would be an offensive one to make.
Dr. Selma Bartholomew = the Vaudeville Duo
Literally who is this? Is anyone voting for her? Past No. 20 on the character-entries list comes a horde of random ones like the Vaudeville Duo that seem very third party.
Brad Lander = Pochacco
The progressive candidate that even your parents like (and may prefer). Pochacco is a universally beloved character but isn’t strong enough to take down Cinnamoroll on his own.
Zohran Mamdani = Pompompurin
As the upstart political wunderkind with new ideas and a general mastery of Instagram, Pompompurin is the favorite for those who love to root for the underdog. His fans started a grassroots campaign on TikTok to dethrone Cinnamoroll, and by the midway point, it looks like it’s working. That’s P-O-M-P-O-M-P-U-R-I-N.
Zellnor Myrie = Kerokerokeroppi
Lawyer and current New York State senator Zellnor Myrie is this year’s other “youth candidate” — a millennial who has fought for affordable housing and against gun violence. Keroppi is a favorite in the U.S. Sanrio elections but not on the broader international circuit; maybe he needs to link up with Pompompurin to raise his ranking.
Eric Adams = Big Challenges
He’s not on the ballot and neither is Big Challenges, but you know what, the name fits.
Related
The two biggest elections of the summer end this week.
